Coaching for blind spots (Part 1)

"In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king." 

I mentioned this to a dear friend over dinner last night as we pondered the recent political developments in two countries (one in which he now lives, and one in which he was born; both of which feature a loud, brash political leader/hopeful). 

How is this relevant to coaching?

Well, it's two things: one, is the degree of certainty that someone else has relative to you and how that influences your decision making, perceptions, beliefs and actions; and two, how much certainty one needs and how blind spots can be our undoing when we cling to that certainty.  

The first point is that of others having more certainty than you. Take the example of a corporate organization, be it a start up, medium enterprise or an MNC. Within a corporate hierarchy, the person with the most certainty (real or perceived) is the leader. This colors the way others respond to, interact with and follow them.

Over lunch this week with a client (Miss O) she even put it this way, "My former colleagues are individually, the nicest, warmest people I know. But once they walk through those office doors they do things they know aren't ethically above board. They know it. Why do they still do it?"

It's not just at work. How often has someone told you that they feel uncomfortable with what they say or do, but do it anyway because they feel they need to. Out of obligation, to attract or maintain a relationship, to be seen in a certain light by others...the list goes on.

When we get stuck, one question to ask yourself is whether someone else's certainty is influencing the way you behave or think? What patterns, questions and "facts" are you telling yourself to do what you're doing, that makes you feel stuck? What could you do to ensure you are in integrity with your true self when interacting with others? What else is possible?

To be continued in the next post!